Traveling Thoughts

Made it to the airport, on the plane, but barely!  At 10:10am, my dad was driving me and Misha to the San Jose airport for our 12:20pm departure to Denver, then Denver to Newark, New Jersey.  I got a text from Southwest as we exited the freeway toward the SJ airport saying the flight from Denver to Newark was cancelled.  Misha immediately was on the phone with Southwest to figure out a way to get us to New Jersey today.  There were no other flights from Denver to Newark today, all the flights from San Francisco and Oakland to Newark were full, and no red eye flights…aaaahh!  A flight out of Sacramento at 1:25pm, stopping in Phoenix, then onto Newark?  We’ll take it!

Thank goodness Jackson was safe at home with Misha’s mom and Sophie at preschool.  My mom was on her way from Davis to help out in San Jose while we are gone, and my dad was speed racing us to the Sacramento Airport.  Thank goodness we made it to the airport by noon, had time to grab some food (GFCFSF) for the airplane and all without stressing too, too much.

See what your family does for you, sweet Jackson?  We speed from airport to airport to attend a conference to gather more information to better understand you and help you come out of the confusing world you are in.  Jackson, you have so much love surrounding you, so many people are on your side cheering for you and there isn’t anything we won’t do for you.

I’m thousands of feet in the air in the first hour of our trip, reflecting on the past two months.  What a whirlwind of emotions I’ve been through.  Up.  Down.  Confident.  Defeated.  Progress. Regression.  Information.  Stuck.  Appointments. Crush.  Squirt. Supplements.  Herb Drops.  Prescriptions.  It’s a lot!  Each day is jam packed with taking care of others, but it’s something I know I can do, do well and continue for the wellbeing of our family.  It all comes down to having a healthy family.  That’s really all one can ask for.  Health.  Happiness.  Peace.

I still have 3 ½ months to concentrate on Jackson full time before I go back to teaching in the fall.  My mind is racing, wondering if, in that time, I will hear words come out of his mouth.  Will I get a “mommy?”  An, “I want that toy,” a “Sophie always gets that movie,” a “doggies!”  I know he’s got it in him.  Changes are coming.  We’ll eventually be ready to get rid of his crib and get him his “big boy” bed, start potty training (eventually), engage in meaningful activities and making memories together.

As we peel away at the toxins in Jackson’s body, I’m going to have to adjust to a new, healthier boy emerge.  It feels like years away right now, but I know it’s coming.  For now, I’m going to sit back in my airplane seat, relax with my inflatable neck pillow, with my headphones and outdated, 90’s iTunes playlist and daydream about our future with Jackson.

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